The countdown clock has tripped over to less than 24 hours and as time inexorably ticks down to zero, pauses for an infinitesimal period, and then begins to accumulate again, so I will embark on the last part of my marathon journey.
When I set the target of running a marathon for charity, I had no idea what lay ahead, whether my Achilles would hold up, whether my Lymphoedema would be adversely affected, whether my ‘perfect plan’ would work out. I had no doubt that I would enjoy returning to running, but was uncertain whether my body would let me. Looking back today, and ahead to tomorrow, I am so pleased that I took the leap of faith. I have had a ball. My mental state of mind has been great for many weeks now, and even though the swelling in my leg still frustrates me immensely, it IS part of my life & I just have to deal with it.
My Coach always says that I’m a better ‘trainer’ than ‘competitor’, and I have been in my element for the last four months, banging out session after session. Having said that, the proof of the pudding is in the eating, so we will see whether limiting my runs to just 3 a week, with the heaviest mileage week being only 44 miles, will actually be enough. Funnily enough I think that will be a conversation for me and my inner chimp to have around mile 16 tomorrow!
Talking about my Coach, currently in New York LSN ), my purpose. Training my body over these past months has, primarily, been to achieve this one objective, to be able to complete the course and raise money. I set a target of £1,000 and due to fantastic support from family, friends, and new acquaintances via social media (thank you twitter followers!), I have exceeded this amount. Not to say that there isn’t room for more, so if you want to join in please donate via www.justgiving.com/JulietteClark.
And then, worthiness; this is where perhaps I feel at my most vulnerable and fragile mentally. We, as athletes, tend to feel good about ourselves when mind and body come together, when we are at the ‘top of our world’. But, when there are elements of your body that don’t function as they should, it’s hard to prevent negative feelings of self-loathing from sneaking in. Running this marathon and contemplating the challenge for tomorrow I am reminded of my worth. I can and will run 26.2 miles; I can and will achieve my first goal of my ‘just giving year’ as I have a truly respectable sum to hand over to LSN ; and I can and will feel worthy when I cross that finish line with arms aloft.
To all of you that have supported me with messages of good luck and inspiration, thank you for helping me on this journey.
